Ken Blanchard, renowned management guru and author of The One Minute Manager amongst 60 other books, is credited with saying that feedback is The Breakfast of Champions. Ken himself, perhaps fearing negative feedback for plagiarism, ascribes the saying to a former colleague, Rick Tate. Rick explained it in sports terms. “Can you imagine training for the Olympics with no one telling you how fast you ran or how high you jumped? That idea seems ludicrous, yet many people operate in a vacuum in organisations, not knowing how well they are doing on any given task?”
That makes sense in a business context, how can a business or its employees improve without a feedback loop, formal or informal? The same applies at a personal level, how long can we go on leaving the toilet seat up thinking it isn’t a problem before it unexpectedly becomes an example of everything wrong in a relationship? Show of hands – who here believes that feedback is an important part of life (not just giving it!)?
Do we need to talk?
So, if we agree that feedback is important;
– Show of hands – who likes to give feedback about a difficult topic?
– Another show of hands – who likes to get feedback about a difficult topic?
So, it’s fair to say that generally, we aren’t comfortable about getting or giving feedback, especially if it is about a difficult topic?
It’s a mindset when receiving it and a skill when giving it
At a personal level choosing and practising a mindset of welcoming all feedback, whether personal or business, as a growth opportunity rather than a personal attack takes away the sting you might have felt.
Developing skills and structures around giving feedback means that feedback is more likely to land the way you want it to; in that you want to help the person or business you are giving to. You can even ask for feedback on your feedback!
Developing a feedback receival mindset
The first step is to show you are open to feedback. Setting in place formal structures like surveys, reviews, focus groups, or even just asking peers, friends, partners, and business colleagues for feedback shows you are genuinely interested in them and growth. Thanking people that are prepared to give you genuine, helpful feedback also helps encourage more feedback.
Developing skills in giving feedback
The more you give feedback, the easier it gets, especially if you are giving feedback to help and not punish. You will quickly work out who is interested in improvement and who isn’t. Giving feedback out of the blue as an ambush doesn’t work. It needs structure and context. That said, it can be as simple as “would you be open to some feedback about that referral you gave me”. If they say no, you know who you are working with!
Feedback or Personal Attack?
The feedback that is given or received with the genuine intent to help is great. Occasionally it will go astray where it isn’t framed in the way the receiver or you need to hear it. But if you look at the intent of the feedback, and it’s genuinely meant to help, then you can reinterpret the content or delivery and still get value from it. Try and take your emotion out of it However, in today’s world, feedback, especially through some platforms, isn’t feedback, it’s meant as a personal attack. In these circumstances, if it upsets you, walk away from it, remove yourself from that environment, and be where people genuinely want to help you.
Feedback and BNI
Sometimes in BNI we are reluctant to give feedback, either directly to other members or when needed, to the Leadership Team about members who don’t respond to feedback. We can think it is for the good of the chapter to “suck it up”. This rarely works out well. Quick, honest, well-intended feedback can nip an issue in the bud. If it doesn’t then there may be a wider issue that could affect the whole chapter if left unaddressed.
Summary
Feedback is a subset of communication. Most issues in the world can be solved by good communication coupled with good intent. Try improving your communication by eating The Breakfast of Champions.
