In my previous post I described the challenge that faced me during my coaching training with Debbie Ford once I came to the realisation that no one was coming to my rescue and that if I wanted to live the life of my dreams, I must let go of my excuses and take full responsibility for all aspects of my life and for making that dream become a reality.
I soon came to understand that the concept of responsibility was about much more than simply taking responsibility for my external world; it would involve taking responsibility for my internal world also, the world of thoughts and emotions. At the time I can clearly remember the cynic in me who laughed at the idea that I could take responsibility for my thinking and feeling. I knew that it was possible to mentally lift myself up when I was feeling down but that was about as far as I had got to in the internal responsibility stakes.
My homework after that particular training session was to simply observe my thinking mind without judgement. Even this concept seemed bizarre. How could I observe my own mind? Wasn’t my mind me? Weren’t we one?
Well, as bizarre as it all seemed, I dutifully went about the process of beginning to observe my own thinking. Firstly, I realised it was indeed quite possible to observe one’s thinking. It certainly wasn’t easy as most of the time I was the thinking mind. “It” and “me” were one. But every so often I would “wake up” from an incessant stream of thoughts and notice what had just been going on – and it was SHOCKING!
My observation showed that my thinking was mainly repetitive, lacked any sort of creativity, was very limiting and frequently negative…all day long, day after day after day. Research studies in recent years support my initial observations. Some studies show that up to 95% of our thinking is repetitive! For the first time I clearly saw what a fine line there was between sanity and insanity and it was truly disturbing. I imagined what it would be like if others could hear this thinking. They might wonder if I was insane! Or perhaps it would sound familiar to them; did we all share an element of this uninspiring and repetitive thinking process?
As I continued training with Ford and embarked on an M.A. in Consciousness Studies I would come to understand that no one truly begins the awakening process until they can begin the process of self-observation. The great teacher, the Buddha, guided his students to observe their own thinking, but to observe it with non-judgement and compassion. I can see why. To enter the observation process in a state of judgement and without compassion is to simply wage another war against the self. Our mind needs no help in that regard!
A few weeks ago as I watched a live video streaming from New York of Debbie Ford, Marianne Williamson and Deepak Chopra releasing their book The Shadow Effect (after the movie of the same name) I heard Chopra say that “one of the highest forms of human intelligence is to observe the self without judgement”. Over more than two and a half thousand years the world’s great wisdom teachers continue to share the same message.
If we are to be extraordinary leaders, leaders who effect much needed change in our world, then we must understand that waking up is an inside job. The transformation we seek in our external world begins at home; right here in our own minds and our own hearts.
6 comments
Another excellent commentary Jenny, I can empathise totally with ‘waking up’ concept from ones wilderness to the real world… ThankQ very much.
My regards,
kenn
Oh I like that Kenn…”from one’s wilderness”…a great analogy of the human mind.
I like to think about the idea of holding ‘a point of tension’ between two positions or points of view – recognising that truth is neither absolute nor relative – rather that it evolves, develops and is constructed over time. By observing what you are thinking – from the dialectic perspective, change can occur through synthesis – and new meanings can be found within old meanings – moving closer to the essence of the subject being considered.
Thanks for a great article Jenny.
Graham.
Thanks for that observation Graham. Yes, it’s useful to consider the idea of synthesis within thinking (new meanings within old). Actually, I like to practise non-thinking, although I am not good at it! It moves beyond the dialectic (truth through exchange of logical arguments) and moves us into a new territory of spaciousness and non-knowing. A lot of possibility there. Perhaps that’s another article!
Cheers
It indeed all begins with observing one’s thoughts, so I love what you write here; “I would come to understand that no one truly begins the awakening process until they can begin the process of self-observation.”
Once I too had let go of major misgivings about observing my thoughts, I found my thoughts often fighting with each other, the familiar arguing with the new. I have found it amazing to notice how resistant I have been to embrace new thinking, how often I did not see the ships that were visible to others.
It is astounding to see how little thought is given to thoughts, as thoughts are the precurser to everything we do. And how little I have owned my own thoughts.
But as you say, if we want to be the change we desire to see, guess what…I have to take responsibility for my thinking. That has been scary though, because I have become to be wary of who to believe. Now I work with my mind and my heart, combine my thinking with my feelings.
Thanks for supporting my thinking, although I am responsible it is great to feel supported. xox Wilma
Thanks for sharing your experience with the self-observation process Wilma. Yes, the more we practice with compassionate self observation (whether in meditation or throughout the day) the greater our ability to gently shift our thinking and create new possibilities for ourselves.
Good for you Wilma!
Comments are closed.