My enquiry into leadership has led me to ‘The Art of Loving’ by Erich Fromm. Fromm is one of the major figures in the field of psychoanalysis – and the book is an investigation into the role of love as the ultimate need and desire of all human beings. It is his comments on ‘Giving’ however that I wanted to share on this post:
So what is giving? The most widespread misunderstanding is that which assumes that giving is giving up something, being deprived of, sacrificing. However for the productive character, giving has an entirely different meaning. Giving is the highest expression of potency. In the very act of giving, I experience my strength, my wealth, my power. This experience of heightened vitality and potency fills me with joy. I experience myself as overflowing, spending, alive, hence as joyous. Giving is more joyous than receiving, not because it is a deprivation but because in the act of giving lies the expression of my aliveness.
In the sphere of material things giving means being rich. Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much. The hoarder who is anxiously worried about losing something is, psychologically speaking, the poor, impoverished man, regardless of how much he has. Whoever is capable of giving himself is rich. He experiences himself as one who can confer of himself to others. The most important sphere of giving however, is not that of material things, but lies in the human realm.
So there you have it – in BNI we call this Givers Gain – however whatever way you want to dress it up – as you give, so shall you receive.Enjoy the Christmas break 🙂
