Waking up as a leader is an inside job

In my previous post I described the challenge that faced me during my coaching training with Debbie Ford once I came to the realisation that no one was coming to my rescue and that if I wanted to live the life of my dreams, I must let go of my excuses and take full responsibility for all aspects of my life and for making that dream become a reality.

I soon came to understand that the concept of responsibility was about much more than simply taking responsibility for my external world; it would involve taking responsibility for my internal world also, the world of thoughts and emotions. At the time I can clearly remember the cynic in me who laughed at the idea that I could take responsibility for my thinking and feeling.  I knew that it was possible to mentally lift myself up when I was feeling down but that was about as far as I had got to in the internal responsibility stakes.

My homework after that particular training session was to simply observe my thinking mind without judgement. Even this concept seemed bizarre.  How could I observe my own mind? Wasn’t my mind me? Weren’t we one?

Well, as bizarre as it all seemed, I dutifully went about the process of beginning to observe my own thinking.   Firstly, I realised it was indeed quite possible to observe one’s thinking.  It certainly wasn’t easy as most of the time I was the thinking mind. “It” and “me” were one. But every so often I would “wake up” from an incessant stream of thoughts and notice what had just been going on – and it was SHOCKING!

My observation showed that my thinking was mainly repetitive, lacked any sort of creativity, was very limiting and frequently negative…all day long, day after day after day. Research studies in recent years support my initial observations. Some studies show that up to 95% of our thinking is repetitive!  For the first time I clearly saw what a fine line there was between sanity and insanity and it was truly disturbing. I imagined what it would be like if others could hear this thinking.  They might wonder if I was insane! Or perhaps it would sound familiar to them; did we all share an element of this uninspiring and repetitive thinking process?

As I continued training with Ford and embarked on an M.A. in Consciousness Studies I would come to understand that no one truly begins the awakening process until they can begin the process of self-observation. The great teacher, the Buddha, guided his students to observe their own thinking, but to observe it with non-judgement and compassion. I can see why.  To enter the observation process in a state of judgement and without compassion is to simply wage another war against the self.  Our mind needs no help in that regard!

A few weeks ago as I watched a live video streaming from New York of Debbie Ford, Marianne Williamson and Deepak Chopra releasing their book The Shadow Effect (after the movie of the same name) I heard Chopra say that “one of the highest forms of human intelligence is to observe the self without judgement”.  Over more than two and a half thousand years the world’s great wisdom teachers continue to share the same message.

If we are to be extraordinary leaders, leaders who effect much needed change in our world, then we must understand that waking up is an inside job. The transformation we seek in our external world begins at home; right here in our own minds and our own hearts.